Saturday, April 12, 2008

Two Guys And A Girl

You know the date is going awry when you’re wishing you were with someone else soon after you step into the car. Such was the case on my date tonight. But the beginning of this date isn’t where I should begin. This story started a month ago.
Last month I was stopped by a lady in my neighborhood. “I’m SO sorry. I feel horrible!” What was she talking about? I was asking myself the same question. I soon deduced from her ramblings that she had given my phone number to a friend of hers and this friend was going to give it to her grandson. She felt guilty because she hadn’t asked for my permission first. (Truly, this is one thing that bugs me. If you’re going to give out someone’s personal information…ASK THEM FIRST!) I told her it wasn’t a big deal because I was sure he wouldn’t actually call. Nine out of ten times they don’t in a situation like this. She started telling me what a wonderful young man he was (she’d never met him). His grandma had said that he just couldn’t seem to find anyone and well, everyone knows that Annie has issues in the dating department. Ok, she didn’t actually say that, but that’s how it felt. Then to top off an already uncomfortable situation, my neighbor and mom start joking about how this could be my destiny…HE could be my destiny. Oh, how I loathe that. It instantly fills my soul with quiet rebellion.A month later (last Tuesday to be precise), he called me. We had a pleasant conversation where he asked me on a date for Friday night at seven. He then said he would call Thursday night and let me know what was going on. Thursday came and went. There was no phone call. So by Friday around 5:30 I’m thinking he’s a jerk. He called shortly after I’d expressed that thought audibly to my parents. Yes, I felt bad about my prejudgment. He had been busy and couldn’t call; a reasonable excuse. He said he’d call me later and get directions. 7:30 rolled around and (surprise, surprise) I did get that call. He showed up on my porch a minute later.
When I opened the door he gave me the weirdest look. That is a VERY comforting way to start a date. Believe me. (I rolled my eyes while writing that, by the way.) I found out later that his grandma told him I was 5' 10" tall. Those that know me know I’m indeed 5' 10"…minus 10 inches. Hence the weird look. Anyway, back to the date. He opened my door which is a major plus in my book (but didn’t do it again the rest of the evening, which turned the plus into a minus.). We got to his car and he sayed, “By the way, my friend is going to tag along with us.” What? Are you kidding me? His friend was indeed in the back seat. They said we were going to pick up another girl (phew, his friend was going to have a date. If not, that would be awkward.). Well, she wasn’t home and apparently hadn’t given an affirmation that she would go in the first place. So there we were; two guys and a girl. Every girls dream right? WRONG! They asked me a couple questions about myself and then started spouting inside jokes to each other. I’m all for inside jokes, but if your date doesn’t share those same jokes, you don’t use them. I’m telling you, it felt like THEY were on the date and I was the third wheel.
They told me the plan for the evening; we were going to attend a concert at the LDS Institute. We got there earlier than expected so we played foozball before the concert. My date and I were on one side, and the friend was on the other. We gave him a sore beating. He was complaining the whole time, so my date decided that they should play one-on-one. The friend beat my date and then turned and challenged me to a one-on-one game. He was being extremely obnoxious, so guess what I did…I kicked his trash, baby! Oh yeah! I know; guys don’t like it when you beat them at games and such, but he was driving me crazy with his whining, trash talk, and mostly the self aggrandizement. So I bruised his ego! Mwah ha ha!!!
We went up to get a seat for the concert and the friend left to find other people. Talking to my date was like pulling teeth (funny, since he wanted to be accepted into the pre-dental program). I asked questions and he’d give me short answers. We sat in silence for quite a while. Thankfully, some of his friends came up to talk to him and I had friends who offered a nice distraction as well. After they left, he asked me where the other guy had gone. I didn’t know (and frankly didn’t care). He said, “I’m going to go find him. I’ll be back.” Ten minutes later he returned. Yep, ten minutes. Fabulous date etiquette (as was talking and texting on their phones which they did frequently throughout the evening).
The concert was great. I thoroughly enjoyed the music, but I think the guys were disappointed that I was sitting between them. When it was over I thought we were going to leave. We were wandering around the institute, not helping clean up which also bugged me. The least we could do was help, but I was following Dumb and Dumber. What could I do? Ok, that was rude. They were nice guys and they seemed smart, but they kept quoting movies such as the one afore mentioned. Anyway, they walked AHEAD of me. Then my date would realize his error and slow down to walk with me (he was really tall and he walked really fast. I think I did a marathon trying to keep up.) I tried to stay by my date, as a good date should, and the friend kept walking between us. Then walking (jogging) started to feel like freeway driving. I’d slow down and walk behind the friend to the other side and merge next to my date. The friend would cross two lanes of traffic and end up on my other side or would cut me off entirely. He was driving (no pun intended) me crazy and my date seemed oblivious. I was praying for the night to come to a swift end, but they wanted to stand around and stare at band equipment.
They eventually came to the conclusion that it was time to leave (finally!). The entire ride home was filled with movie quotes and inside jokes followed by apologies for being so weird. Then, pulling into my driveway, the friend says, “Sorry you didn’t have any alone time. Just pretend I’m not here.” Um…that was awkward. I said it was nice meeting him and hopped out of the car. My date gave me a hug at the doorstep and thanked me for coming. I thanked him in return, went in the house and started laughing. I’ve had some interesting dates, but never one with a “tag-along”. I guess you could say I went on a date with two guys in one night, and was ignored for most of it. How sad! What guy in their right mind would let a great package like me go to waste? I guess I’ll add this to the experience cabinet (which is getting quite full) and let time do its magic. I’ve heard that women are like fine wine, better with age. I just hope this part of life gets better before I’m completely fermented.
By Annie

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